Seeing eye to eye

You know what is really startling? The day your oldest child walks up to you and you realize that she is looking you straight in the eye and not gazing up at you like the big maternal figure you’ve always been to her.

Seeing Eye to Eye: Belly and Mom

On some days, it feels like a challenge. See me? I’m becoming your equal. I’m not your little girl anymore.

That’s mostly in my head, of course. She is still my little girl who needs my help, advice, and cash (of course) to get through the days. But, she often reminds me that she’s not a baby anymore through her words, actions, and the occasional disdainful headshake that let’s me know that I am so, so, so not cool.

But it’s an amazing thing to see the kids literally growing up (and up), having their own (strong) opinions, making their own decisions (good and bad), and just generally going from being little kids to teens.

I’m pretty okay with this. But the day I wake up and my other two are towering over me? I may need some time to myself that day to collect my thoughts.

Seeing Eye to Eye: All three kids

Running with asthma: A race of one

I was supposed to run a 5K today as part of my “me-and-my-big-ideas” Facebook proclamation to run one race a month in 2014. Things were looking good: I made it through races in  January and February even though they aren’t typical “racing months” up here in New England. With spring around the corner, my resolution was looking like a sure thing.

Funny how “sure things” can become “not sure things” so quickly.

I’ve been plagued for the past few months by the reappearance of an old and not-so-welcome friend: Asthma. I used to blithely wave away the notion that asthma was any big deal for me, but it’s become a bigger deal this winter for reasons I can’t really ascertain. Tweaks in medications, short stints of Prednisone, a newly acquired Nebulizer. . .all these things work for a bit. . .but then I’m back to sucking air like a fish out of water whenever I try to run more than a mile.

Today should have been  my “March” race day. A 5k to support autism research, it was the only race I could fit into a jam-packed month. But, a recent head cold had settled into my chest and walking up the stairs was proving difficult. How could I run 3.1 miles when a walking the dog around the block was an effort?

So, instead of pinning  a number to my chest, I decided to slog out 3-ish miles alone, at my own pace, in my rainy neighborhood. It was slow going, with lots (and lots) of walking (and coughing) breaks. I got soaking wet. And pissed off. And worried. And frustrated.

I know my woes are no different from the runner with a reoccurring hamstring injury that is always in the back of their minds, or the swimmer whose shoulder tweaks during a workout, pulling them out of the pool while it heals.

And I know running has been so good for me and for my breathing overall. And that it will only take a few good weeks to get back to where I was before I got sick. But, right now, I just would really, really love to breathe like a normal person.

And run like someone who’s been working at it for two years, and not like a pack-a-day smoker who just decided to get off the couch.


Let’s Play “Match the Child to their Christmas List”

The cast of characters:

Almost-13 year old girl. Wants to be 15. Spends days with headphones on and iPod in hand.

10 1/2 year old girl. Loves the “big girls”, but not quite ready to leave behind her little-girl ways

9 year old boy. Has no concept of “budget” yet.

List #1

LEGO Mindstorms EV3; Minecraft for PC; Swedish fish; LEGO sets; soda; money; iPhone; email account; candy; remote-control helicopter-car-boat; a bird; a rat; DS games; Wii games; a trip to anywhere; Wii U; a go-cart; iPad; a boat; a car; a kite; a Wii remote; a sled; laser guns

List #2

iPhone 5S (or 5C); EM Cosmetics: Life Pallet in “Day Life”, lipstick in light pink, lip gloss, concealer, eyebrow touch up, definition enhancer; SORRY! (the game); Just Dance 2014; Otterbox in Berry; Noise-canceling headphones; Divergent 4+6 necklace; Divergent rings; Totoro plushie

List #3

Good-smelling perfume; purse that goes around shoulder; Elizabeth’s hair fixed (her American Girl doll); a bedside table; a picture or poster–in pink–to go next to bed; her ears pierced; pink water bottle (to match bedroom)