Time Warp

When I turned 40 a few weeks ago, my Mom gave me this gem of a book—something she was given 20+ years ago when she turned 40. . .

Ahhhh, yes. . .the wisdom of 1983, when forty-year-old women were assumed to have grown children (if any) and were now out in the work force being liberated from the trials and tribulations of toddlers, infants and (shudder) pregnancy.

While some of the statements inside make sense (who doesn’t agree with “I’d rather be 40 than. . .an awkward teenager having to struggle with inept 17-year-old lovers in the back of cars”?), others made this forty-year-old mother of three young children laugh:

“I’d rather be 40 than. . .dependent again on in-laws, babysitters, and play groups for my freedom.” (playgroups used to mean freedom???)

“I’d rather be 40 than. . .waiting longingly for “Sesame Street” to begin each day.” (remember those days before “On Demand” programming? Seems almost quaint).

“I’d rather be 40 and. . .able to spend weekends shopping or visiting museums rather than sitting through Bambi and Snow White matinee reruns with the kids.” (boy, having kids must’ve sucked back then!)

“I’d rather be 40 than. . .be unable to express my self because of demands of children, husband, or low level bosses.”

and:

“I’d rather be 40 than. . .lacking the brains, gumption, and confidence to direct my life in the ways that make me happiest.” (yes, 40 will set you F-R-E-E!!! I hit 40 and got oodles of gumption!)

So, look forward to 40! It means cool clothes, mature men, respect in the workplace, confidence, great sex and most definitely NOT diapers, spit-up and baby strollers. . . or so the book says.

Comments

  1. Wow. 40 sounds so much better than 30. In fact, it sounds like heaven. Can I get there now?

  2. That’s funny. Maybe your Mama should have read it a little first to see if it was applicable…..however, in my case I can say that I am not yet forty and struggling to make sure akward 17 year olds are not in the backseat of any car with any lovers…that 17 year old (15 yr and 13 yr old) being my own. I guess everything is relative! There is no magic easy age. Different ages equal different problems and different joys.

  3. I was free free free at 40. Baby arrived at 42 (almost 43).

  4. Damn “low level bosses”!

  5. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  6. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  7. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  8. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  9. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  10. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  11. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  12. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  13. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  14. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  15. pinks & Blues Girls says

    It’s always fun to read books like that from the past. I was reading one a few years ago that was written in the 50’s about making sure you have a nice meal all ready for your husband when he comes home from work. My favorite part was when they said to make sure you don’t bother him with your struggles at home. If he wants to know about your day, he’ll ask! Ha!

    I’ve met you, and let me tell you, you make 40 look GOOD!

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  16. I’m 40 and free…but trying not to be. Hopefully my first baby will be born a month before I’m 41!

  17. Blog Antagonist says

    Oh, I like that. I like it much, much better than gratuitous dread. I’m 2 years away, but already it feels like it’s looming, waiting, lurking.

  18. Oh, I’m so glad to hear 40 is all about the gumption!

    Only 3 more months to go and I will surely be free as a bird!

    PS happy birthday to the little man.

  19. This is so funny Christina. I love how the woman on the cover looks like one of those elderly ladies who wear the red hats. I know that’s how I will personally dress when I turn 40 next year.

  20. Oprah — my personal guru — says that 40 is the new 30, so maybe give yourself 10 years and then free youself from the burden of low-level bosses. Braahahahahaha.

  21. I’m newly 40 too (shudder!) and it feels a lot better than some of these comments, for sure, but I still wonder how far we have come? are we really better off than our mothers? or even than their’s? sometimes I wonder. I just said to a friend today—why is it that I have so much to do and my life is so full—yet I feel so lonely?

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