Tongue Twisted

She was sullen all morning. Argumentative.

“She’s been away for three days. Let her be,” I told myself as I steered clear and tried to avoid a fight. She was clearly in the mood for a fight.

Funny, though, that when she is in this type of mood, she wants to be near me. Like a dog nipping at my ankles, waiting for me to kick.

I got into the shower, turned on the water and faced my back toward her as she slunk in the doorway.

“Do you believe that there is a Santa Claus?”, she asked, barely audible above the noise of the shower.

“What? Do I believe in Santa? Sure. . .but, what did you hear? Do you want to talk?”

“No. . .nothing. Forget it.”

“No wait, I just need to rinse my head. I’ll be right out!”

She walked away.

A minute later, dripping in a towel, I sat and talked to her but the moment was gone. She says she will stay up Christmas Eve until she sees him. If he doesn’t appear, she’s decided it is actually mom or dad.

I nodded, trying to clear my hungover, tired head to say something of importance, of meaning.

“I started thinking the same thing at your age”, was all I mustered.

She sighed, smiled, and slowly became my little girl again.

Seven years old and another step forward.

For me, perhaps another step back. I think in words all the time. Why do they fail me at times like this?


  1. Whirlwind says

    I think when we, as parent’s, are taken off guard, we don’t know what to say. But if you wait to long, you lose the moment.

    Our weakness, is with the tooth fairy. We’ve forgotten several time s(the latest being Wednesday evening) thankfully, it rained that night and we thought fast – fairy’s of course, cannot fly when it rains.

  2. I don’t know if I’m ready for our kids to ‘grow up’.

  3. I cannot imagine what came up during the three nights at Oma’s!

  4. The Cooking Lady says

    There is nothing more grounding than realizing that your little ones are growing up and growing away from you.

    That does not mean they are gone, just stepping away.

  5. Oh, goodness. This made me cry because we’re getting the same thing, always when least expected. I don’t think we’ll make it through the season a believer. At this age I certainly won’t lie if she asks outright. But still SOOO sad. I’m sure my son, on the other hand, will believe until he’s 12.

  6. It’s so shocking, these sudden leaps ahead….

  7. I still believe in Santa Claus.

    And having a Mom who is willing to listen, even if you believe your words have failed her, is more cherished than you will ever know.

  8. Zip n Tizzy says

    7- the year of reason.
    It’s painful growing up.

  9. hmmmm I got the question, “Mom, are you the tooth fairy?”
    Thankfully I leave it up to hubby so I didn’t exactly lie…..

    I am not ready for her to lose that innocence….

    But, I am with Mrs. Q… what did she talk to Oma about for 3 nights?
    I only ask because the Tooth fairy question came after a sleepover at YiaYia’s….

  10. aw. what a moment. i love that you jumped out of the shower to be present in her moment of doubt.

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