The lollipop plant miracle that mere mortals can perform

This is a reprint from last year, so it may look familiar. For anyone new here (Hi! Welcome!), we hope you’ll enjoy reading about our Valentine’s plant tradition and maybe make it your own. . .

When Belly was a toddler, an online friend posted a Valentine’s tradition that was so easy and flexible that I knew I had to try it out. We are now in our fifth year (this will actually be the sixth), and now the kids expect it. You’d think I’d be better prepared for it each year.

It does involve a bit of deceit, so if you are someone who thinks Santa and his ilk are terrible lies for children to believe, you may want to stop reading now.

OK, here is what you do to make your very own Valentine’s Day Lollipop Plant:

1. A few days before Valentine’s Day, give you child a small empty flower pot.

Procrastinator version*: the night before, take your saddest looking house plant and, without letting the kids see, pull it out of the soil and throw it out into the backyard to serve as compost. Or just use a cup.

2. Let the kids decorate the outside of the pot with stickers, markers, glitter glue.

Procrastinator version*: skip this step; it is almost bedtime!

3. Once the decorations have dried, carefully fill the pot with several inches of fresh potting soil.

Procrastinator version*: search garage, basement and shed for potting soil, to no avail. Either reuse the soil that was once the life force of the dead plant now lying in your backyard, OR, go into the yard with a spoon and chip off a half-inch of hard dry dirt from the frozen ground.

4. Give your child some tiny cinnamon hearts and have him push some into the dirt. Blow a kiss and water them a little bit.

Procrastinator version*: Oops! No cinnamon hearts? Use anything sprinkly or red and hope your kid is too young to notice the difference.

5. If you have started your plant a few days before Valentine’s Day, you can make the plant start to grow over several days. The first night, cut up a few lollipop sticks into various heights. The first night, put the smallest sticks in the dirt so that the plant seems to be ‘sprouting’. The next night, replace those sticks with slightly longer sticks. . .keep this up for a few days.

Procrastinator version*: You did not start your plant a few days before Valentine’s Day.

6. The night before Valentine’s Day (Valentine’s Eve?), replace the sticks with several beautiful lollipops. Go to bed and know that you will be woken to the delighted shrieks of “it grew! it grew!”

Procrastinator version*: The night before, sneak out to the local
CVS after the kids have fallen to sleep and buy the last sad bag of lollipops (which are not red, heart shaped or have anything to do with Valentine’s Day but beggars can’t be choosers). Fall asleep but wake with a jolt at 6am and realize you forgot all about the damn plant. Tiptoe down the stairs, and carefully jam some pops into the dirt. If necessary, shield the plant from view with your body as you do this so your child does not see his mother’s lame attempt at creating “magic”.

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7. Let your beloved eat lollipops before 8am. They will love you for it.

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* taken from personal experience

Comments

  1. Eryn at HomeSchooledYear.com says

    THIS is fantastic. Especially the part with sprouting up lollipop sticks.

    Thank you for letting me know that I'm not the only mother who procrastinates EVERYTHING, even 5 year old family traditions.

    You have no idea how many years Santa's cookies have come out of the oven at 11pm Christmas eve.

  2. Eryn at HomeSchooledYear.com says

    THIS is fantastic. Especially the part with sprouting up lollipop sticks.

    Thank you for letting me know that I'm not the only mother who procrastinates EVERYTHING, even 5 year old family traditions.

    You have no idea how many years Santa's cookies have come out of the oven at 11pm Christmas eve.

  3. What a fun idea! And the only instructions I even considered following were the procrastinators. Funny! Thanks!

  4. What a fun idea! And the only instructions I even considered following were the procrastinators. Funny! Thanks!

  5. I still love this post. And the photo with that GIANT friggin' bottle of wine next to the pops. Momma needed some help last night…

  6. I still love this post. And the photo with that GIANT friggin' bottle of wine next to the pops. Momma needed some help last night…

  7. This is the CUTEST idea, EVER! Also? I kept reading it as lollipoop. No idea.

  8. This is the CUTEST idea, EVER! Also? I kept reading it as lollipoop. No idea.

  9. Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog says

    Thank you for the procrastinator version! I do believe that I can pull THAT one off, at least…

  10. Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog says

    Thank you for the procrastinator version! I do believe that I can pull THAT one off, at least…

  11. Oh, you're so funny. And adorable. Even though I'm sure you don't want to be called adorable. But I'm SORRY. You ARE.

  12. Oh, you're so funny. And adorable. Even though I'm sure you don't want to be called adorable. But I'm SORRY. You ARE.

  13. I can't grow real plants due to my extremely black thumb, but surely I can grow a lollipop plant (or at least buy one at Walgreen's). Excellent idea!

  14. I can't grow real plants due to my extremely black thumb, but surely I can grow a lollipop plant (or at least buy one at Walgreen's). Excellent idea!

  15. Awesome and funny. Dig it!

  16. Awesome and funny. Dig it!

  17. I'm definitely going to try this. Thanks! and I love that there's that bottle of Yellow Tail in the picture. 😉

  18. I'm definitely going to try this. Thanks! and I love that there's that bottle of Yellow Tail in the picture. 😉

  19. Someday I'm actually going to do this…

    Signed,
    A Grade-A Slacker

  20. Someday I'm actually going to do this…

    Signed,
    A Grade-A Slacker

  21. Fairly Odd Mother says

    Dear Robin,

    I haven't even started getting things together to do this yet. No worries.

    Slackers Anonymous

  22. Fairly Odd Mother says

    Dear Robin,

    I haven't even started getting things together to do this yet. No worries.

    Slackers Anonymous

  23. I randomly found this post and knew that we just HAD to do it! We did, and it was a hit with my 2-year old.

    Thanks for inspiring a brand-new tradition in our home – and Happy Valentine's Day!

  24. I randomly found this post and knew that we just HAD to do it! We did, and it was a hit with my 2-year old.

    Thanks for inspiring a brand-new tradition in our home – and Happy Valentine's Day!

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