Exercisus Interupptus

February 16, 2011

The other morning, one of my kids was having a fit over something or other, turned to me and yelled, “You are soooooo FAT!“

Ouch, kiddo. You know where to hit me where it hurts.

I haven’t been exactly the picture of health this winter. Too much grazing, too little (read: none) exercise, too much “oh, I’ll just finish this up instead of saving leftovers”.

Too much top to this muffin, if you know what I mean.

But, it was my child’s angry words that hit me like a slap. I guess not looking at mirrors all winter doesn’t mean I’m invisible. Other people can see what I’ve been trying to ignore. And while I think her “fat” description was a bit excessive (“puffy” is better), it is getting me to rethink how I want to look come June. I don’t want to carry this extra 15 pounds into the summer.

So tonight I decided to start exercising again by taking a few baby steps back toward fitness. Husband is out late, but I figured the kids, at 6, 7 & 10, are more than capable of getting ready for bed while I hit the exercise bike for a paltry 20 minutes.

Five minutes in: “WAH!!!!!” followed by sobs and cries of agony. Jilly had run into the back of D’s head and smashed her nose. I paused the bike, put ice on her nose, kissed her head, and sent her on her way.

Pedal, pedal. Five more minutes pass. “WAH!!!!!” followed by cries and screeches of agony. D had tripped entering his room and whacked his head and knee into the door frame. Pause bike, administer first aid, kiss head, hop back on bike.

Ten more minutes pass relatively uneventfully but then I decide to push my luck and do a 15 minutes “walking” video (I’m pretty sure Jillian Michaels would bitch-slap me for this). Five minutes into it, a morose Belly slithers into the room like a Dementor and sucks all the joy out of the room with her pouting.

At this rate, maybe I should just buy bigger pants.

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Filed Under: Fairly Odd Me, Health n Food Talk 13 Comments

Thankful to have moved to a new chapter

November 25, 2010


I have a lot to give thanks for today, though one of the biggest things will not be discussed around the dinner table. But, she’ll be sitting right there, surrounded by her brother, sister, two adoring cousins and the rest of the family.

I have written a little about what went on this spring and summer, when my vibrant oldest child suddenly stopped eating after getting sick in public with another friend’s family. But, those months seem almost surreal now.


From a fear of food making her sick again, it became a fear of being away from me, and then a fear of leaving the house. It was sudden, shocking, sometimes violent and very scary.

We were lucky, though. We were able to get good help fast, help that is still there to talk to when we need it. We were able to put a common, much less scary name on it: Anxiety.

I have come to understand that her anxiety is probably like the anxiety that bubbles up in me far too often, but as a child, she doesn’t know how to cope with it as well as I (or perhaps I have just found less visible signs of coping: grinding teeth, pacing, crying while driving so the kids can’t see, shutting down to everyone around me when I need to focus, focus, focus or the world will spin out of control.)

Things are not “back to normal”, though who knows what normal is anymore? But, I do know that she can eat again. She will play with friends. She laughs and explores and runs and tells funny stories, and I’m pretty sure anyone who sees her now would never know how tough things were in the middle of the year.

For all of this, I am so very thankful.

May you have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving as well.
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Filed Under: Fairly Odd Kids, Fairly Odd Me, Health n Food Talk 17 Comments

The Fickle Exerciser

October 1, 2010


I’ve fallen off the wagon.


For a while this spring, I was running a few times a week and doing The Shred again. I felt pretty damn good about myself.

And then life fell apart for a while in late spring and lay in a crumpled heap until we started to pick up the pieces in late July. Unlike many, I do not exercise when stress levels get too high: I curl up into a ball and weep.

August was better emotionally but a whirlwind of travel and house guests, though I did manage to eek out a few runs and a bike ride. Those runs were exhilarating and amazing while up in the New Hampshire mountains.

I ran a 5k in September. Yes, ran the whole thing, albeit s-l-o-w-l-y. But that is the extent of any formal “exercise” I got.

Now it is October 1. My clothes are a bit tighter but not obscenely so. I feel like doing sit ups, but part of me thinks, “why?”

I have been a short-term exerciser for as long as I can remember. Sometimes “short term” lasts a year, sometimes it lasts a week. But it has never, ever been as routine as brushing my teeth.

I read Bill’s post “How Badly Do You Want It?” and came up short. Oh sure, I’d love to look like a marathon runner, or maybe even just a really fit version of myself. But how early am I willing to get up? Am I willing to give up my time working in the morning, or evening, for this? Do I try to fit in a half hour of exercise while the kids are reading or coloring or scattering Legos across my living room?

How badly do I want it?

How badly do you want it? Do you make the time for exercise? How?
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Filed Under: Fairly Odd Me, Health n Food Talk, Shred 18 Comments
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